Modern Romance June 2016 Books 5-8. Tara Pammi
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a couple of times as they took the seat.
‘You are nervous,’ Daniil insisted.
‘Not about that. I can’t stand Mika...’ Roman admitted. ‘I thought they were just pretty boys in tights.’
Daniil grinned as he realised the cause of his brother’s tension as they waited for the second act to start.
* * *
Anya was tense too.
She had to be to perform.
She bit into the chocolate treat and sucked in air, and then rolled the foil into a tiny ball.
She was worried about the cleaners throwing it away so it went into the tiny glass case with the feather.
She took a small drink and then touched up her lipstick and headed out.
The orchestra teased and Anya closed her eyes and waited for her time to go on.
The second act was somehow even more amazing. Anya gave it everything that she had.
As she danced she wondered if it were possible to live a dancer’s life with Roman by her side. As Ivan lifted her she felt as if she was touching the sky—perhaps she could have it all.
As the egg cracked open Anya felt as if her heart had opened too.
And now she understood why she should dance for herself.
Roman hadn’t been working his way back to her, he had worked his way to a better self.
And finally he was here.
* * *
The applause was deafening.
And she smiled as she heard him call out to her, ‘Bravo, beautiful woman!’
Her eyes searched for him in the darkness but it was then that everything went black. She stood there, momentarily blinded, and closed her eyes.
Then she opened them again, but everything was still black and Anya realised that she was about to faint.
Ivan the prince caught her.
But Roman could only see that Mika swept her into his arms.
The crowd gasped as Tatania dramatically collapsed and was carried from the stage.
The curtain hurriedly came down and a few moments later an announcement was made that Tatania was fine and had suffered a simple faint after giving her all for the audience.
Roman was already backstage by the time the announcement was made and it was more than a simple faint because she lay pale and retching.
The medics were not taking a chance with their star and an ambulance had already been called.
Mika was holding her head and fanning her face and Roman wanted to rip his stupid feather cap off, but he just knelt down and checked for himself how she was.
‘I just need to go home and rest,’ Anya said.
His was home.
She had fainted after a performance before but tonight she was bundled into an ambulance with an oxygen mask over her face and there was a teeny stand-off between Mika and Roman about who went with her.
‘I’ve got this,’ Roman said, and climbed into the back.
Had he, though? Anya thought.
Surely now he would chastise her—would tell her that she needed to take better care of herself, that it had to stop.
‘It’s okay, baby,’ he said, and he took her hand.
They were wheeled into the emergency department and the staff were excited that she had arrived. There were oohs and ahhs over her beautiful costume as Roman dealt with it. He removed her shoes, ballet tights, bandages and make-up, and not once did he tell her off.
The senior doctor came in and they ran some tests and Roman translated.
‘What is he saying?’ Anya asked.
‘They are concerned about the wild chanterelles that you ate last night.’
‘You poisoned me,’ Anya accused.
‘As I pointed out to the doctor, I ate ten times the amount you did and I am fine.’
‘Well, you couldn’t even catch flu if you tried,’ Anya said as the doctor left, ‘whereas I have a delicate constitution.’
And Roman smiled.
For that was them.
They knew their dance.
Roman’s phone rang and it was Daniil. He said they were all on their way to the hospital and asked how Anya was.
‘She will be okay,’ Roman said. ‘Hold on for a moment...’ He went out and asked the doctor if Anya could have hot chocolate and the doctor agreed.
He told his twin of the best café in Paris for hot chocolate and asked him to stop and fetch some for Anya on his way.
Then he went back in to her. ‘You look better.’
Roman took down the side of the gurney and she made room with her legs for him to sit on the edge, and still he was not cross.
‘There is some colour coming back to your face,’ he said.
Panic had hit him as he’d raced backstage, but there in the midst of the pandemonium he’d been glad that he’d been beside her, because with or without him this would still have happened.
She would never have to deal with anything alone again, and for so long she had.
The weight of her mother’s expectations, the pressure, the demands of her profession, and he wondered about his decision to leave.
He was still sure that he had been right to do so.
But she no longer had to face the world alone.
And when she was at her very worst he made it her best.
‘I’ve spoiled everything,’ Anya said. ‘We were all going to go out...’
‘We might still,’ Roman said, ‘just without you.’
And his small smile told her he was joking.
‘Or we might just have a little after party here.’
‘Some party.’ Anya took in a breath. ‘I honestly don’t know what happened, I felt fine when I was dancing...’
‘You were amazing.’
‘I think maybe it was just the stress of rehearsals, or maybe...’
And she closed her eyes because she would not change a part of yesterday. It hadn’t been the conversation or staying up late or making love that had caused this. She had been tense and teary all week, and yesterday had actually helped things.
‘Well, I can’t wait any longer,’ Roman said.
‘Sorry?’ Anya frowned.
‘I’ve waited for many years to say this, and I don’t want to wait another night.’
He went into his pocket and took out a jewellery box and a faded envelope.
She went for the envelope first and inside it was a letter. She let out several small cries as she read it.
Dearest Anya,
I never wanted to be a burden to you. I know I never said it but I love you.
I have loved you all my life and I still love you in death.
Roman
There were no hearts or kisses, for that was not Roman’s way.
‘You were never a burden.’ And then she found out he would have looked after her even in death.
‘I made my will out to