His Inexperienced Mistress. Chantelle Shaw
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it is.’ His voice was that of a polite stranger. ‘If I had known it was your first time I never would have let things go so far.’
Lily sighed. She had been trying not to feel bad about what had happened last night but his open regret wasn’t helping. Nor was the way he paced back and forth. ‘I think we should just forget it ever happened,’ she said, not quite able to meet his eyes. Lord, was this worse than his rejection of her six years ago? ‘As you already said, we had unfinished business—and now…now we don’t.’
He stopped pacing. ‘And you’re okay with that?’
‘Of course. Aren’t you?’
‘Of course.’
Lily nodded. Of course. What had she expected? A declaration of love? Even the thought was ludicrous, because she absolutely didn’t want that.
‘So…’
‘I also want to apologise for my attitude towards you when I picked you up. For accusing you of using drugs and knowingly bringing them into the country,’ he said.
Lily’s eyebrows shot skyward. ‘So because I was a virgin I’m innocent of drug smuggling as well? Gosh, if only I’d thought to tell the customs official it would have saved all this hassle.’
Tristan threw her a baleful look. ‘Your virginity has nothing to do with my reasoning.’
‘No?’
‘No,’ he said irritably. ‘I had already worked out you weren’t a user before then. And you’ll be pleased to know I’ve fired my investigator.’
‘Shooting the messenger you mean?’ she jeered.
‘His work was substandard—even with the limited time frame he had to collate the information. Hell, I thought you’d be happy to hear that.’
‘Happy that a man lost his job because he confirmed your view of me? He probably just gave you what you wanted, like everybody else does,’ she said caustically.
‘Don’t push it, Lily. You weren’t exactly forthcoming with the truth when I questioned you.’
‘That’s because I don’t find it beneficial to bash my head against a brick wall.’
She saw a muscle tick in his jaw as he regarded her from under hooded eyes.
‘Tell me why I found you hiding a joint under Jo’s mattress when you were fourteen.’
‘I thought you were apologizing?’ she countered.
‘I did.’
‘It could use some work.’
Tristan said nothing, his expression coolly assessing. It was a look Lily had come to recognise. It meant that he fully intended to get his own way.
‘Don’t use your courtroom tactics with me, Tristan,’ she said frostily. ‘They won’t work.’
‘Would it help if I tell you Jordana has already admitted that it was hers?’
Lily tried to keep her surprise from showing. ‘When?’
‘The day of your apprehension at Heathrow. I didn’t believe her at the time.’
Lily placed her hand against her chest with a flourish. ‘Oh, and for a minute there I felt so special.’
She could see her sarcasm had irritated him, but he rubbed a hand across his eyes before piercing her with his gaze again.
‘It’s confession time, Lily. I know my sister hasn’t been the saint I’ve wanted her to be, and I’m tired of the misunderstandings between us.’
Lily thought about arguing—but what was the point? He’d only get his own way in the end.
‘If you remember, you visited our boarding school on a surprise birthday visit for Jo—only she saw you from the rec room. She called me on the internal phone and asked me to hide it. I hadn’t expected you would walk in without knocking.’
‘And the night of Jo’s eighteenth? In my father’s study? No evading the answer this time.’
‘You should ask Jordana.’
‘I’m asking you.’
Lily crossed the floor and sat on the striped Rein occasional chair in the corner. ‘I don’t know how the party in your dad’s study got started. I was tipped off by a mutual friend, and by the time I got there it was in full swing. I felt responsible, because the guy who’d brought the drugs worked for my stepfather’s company, but no one listened when I told them to clean it up. So I decided to step in and do it myself and—’
‘I walked in, put two and two together, and came up with several hundred.’
‘Something like that.’
‘And you didn’t think to defend yourself?’ His tone was accusatory.
‘You didn’t exactly give me much of a chance, remember?’ she felt stung into retorting.
Tristan shook his head and strode over to the window, pushing the heavy curtain aside to stare outside.
Lily shifted and tucked her legs under her on the chair, absently noting how the light from the incoming sun picked up the bronzed highlights in his hair.
Then he turned back, his expression guarded. ‘I’m sorry.’
Did he have to look quite so good-looking?
She cleared her throat and shifted uncomfortably on her seat. If he was apologising why did she suddenly feel so nervous? ‘It’s fine; I shouldn’t have invited that guy in the first place.’
He shrugged as if that were inconsequential. ‘I shouldn’t have jumped to conclusions. I…I wasn’t quite myself that night.’
Lily’s mind immediately spun back to the dance floor. The kiss. Had he not been himself then either? How embarrassing.
‘Me either,’ she lied.
He nodded, as if that solved everything, and Lily’s heart sank a little. ‘Was there something else?’
He shook his head and then glanced towards her bed.
‘Actually, yes.’ He pointed to the bed. ‘I’m sorry to say that your premonition about the photos has come true.’
Lily rose and walked over to the bed. ‘Oh.’
‘I said a little more than that myself,’ he acknowledged ruefully.
‘I did too.’ She glanced up briefly. ‘Internally…’
She thought a momentary smile curved his mouth, but it might easily have been a trick of the light given how stiff and remote he seemed.
‘I should go.’
‘Yes,’ Lily agreed, following him with her eyes as he walked to the door. Then he stopped abruptly.
‘Are you…okay this morning?’ His voice was rough and slightly aggressive and she knew what he was asking.
‘I thought we’d just agreed to forget last night?’
‘I’m allowed to check how you are, dammit. And don’t say fine.’
She arched an eyebrow. ‘Will great do?’ she asked lightly.
His nostrils flared and she thought that maybe now was not a good time to aggravate him.
Tristan’s mouth tightened. This situation was intolerable. He couldn’t be in the same room with her and not want to touch her, but it was obvious by the proud tilt of her head that she wouldn’t welcome his advances. He didn’t know what he had expected from her this morning, but her suggestion that they forget last night had surprised him. And annoyed him. Because he wasn’t sure he could