Heart of a Soldier. Belle Calhoune
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didn’t matter. It had been almost six years since he’d spoken to him. He wasn’t even certain his father knew he’d made it back from Afghanistan. Nor did he think he even cared. For too long now, he’d been seeking something from the man that he’d never been willing to give. Acceptance. Unconditional love.
At the moment he felt like a ship without a rudder. Here he was in West Falls, Texas, as clueless as the day he was born. For so long he’d been running. From his father. From the painful gibes about his paternity. He’d run away from Madden, Oklahoma, straight into the service. At some point he just had to stand still. And perhaps God had placed him here in West Falls for a reason.
He stroked his chin with his thumb, deep in thought. “My rent is paid up for the next four months, and I really don’t have a lot of options. I need to find a job until I can get on my feet. From what I’ve seen, West Falls is a nice community.”
Holly’s eyes began to blink, and her mouth was agape. “You’re staying?”
He was still filled with so much uncertainty, but this decision to stick around was based more on practicality than anything else. In his current financial situation, losing several months’ rent was a big deal. For years he’d been sending the majority of his active-duty paycheck back home to his mother. And even though she’d socked some of it away for him in a bank account, he was still far from being solvent. In order to realize his dreams of owning his own ranch, he needed to keep making positive strides in that direction. Instead of acting impulsively once again, he’d have to stick around West Falls, at least until his lease ran out. And perhaps he could find work to tide him over while he was in town.
Holly’s gaze was strong and steady. It made him squirm some. Her eyes were such a deep, piercing blue. They pulled him in, and for a moment, all he could do was stare at her. Holly. His pen pal. His more than a friend but not quite a girlfriend. At the moment she was an enigma. As much as her letters had revealed about her life at Horseshoe Bend Ranch, her family and her abiding faith, she’d kept her disability a secret. Surely there were ripple effects in her daily life because of the accident and her being a paraplegic.
“Yep,” he acknowledged begrudgingly. “It looks like I’ll be staying for a while.”
Holly’s eyes widened, and her throat convulsed as she swallowed. “West Falls will welcome you with open arms. And it would be fine with me if you wanted to work here at the ranch. With your background, it would make perfect sense.”
Open arms? For some reason he couldn’t imagine it. His own hometown hadn’t been half as accepting of him and the single mother who’d raised him. No, they’d been considered inferior due to his mother’s unmarried status and the lack of a father figure in the picture. It hadn’t helped matters that his mother had been stunningly beautiful, making all the married women in town clutch their husbands tightly to their sides whenever she was in their presence. She hadn’t deserved their judgment and disapproval. Hurt roared through him as the bitter memories swept over him. There hadn’t been an ounce of compassion or goodness in any of them!
Holly shot him a nervous smile. “It’s a big place with plenty of work to keep you busy.”
He nodded at her, his thoughts a jumbled mess. So far this day had not shaped up as he’d planned. And he had no one to blame but himself for much of it. “I’ll think about it. It’s mighty nice for you to suggest it,” he said. “Especially since I showed up here out of the blue.”
“I think it might work out nicely,” she said, her expression a bit guarded. “If you’re open to it.”
He felt himself frowning. There was no way he was getting too optimistic about West Falls, even if the idea of a job at Horseshoe Bend Ranch seemed almost perfect. If he built up his hopes too high, he’d most likely be disappointed. He’d taken this huge leap of faith without thinking things through in a mature manner. And he’d gotten burned by her lie.
All this time he’d been focused on meeting Holly and building on the foundation they’d already established. But perhaps he’d really been doing what he’d always done. Running away. From Madden. From the fear of failure. From a father, who treated him like a castoff. Far away from gossipmongers and painful half-truths. Unknowingly, he’d run straight toward another complicated situation. He’d gotten involved with a woman who didn’t think enough of him to be straight with him.
Although he’d been hopeful about finally finding peace in this town, things weren’t half as simple as he’d envisioned. Just when he’d thought his life was about to be as calm as a lake in summer, a twist of fate had changed everything. At the moment he felt as uncertain about his future as when he’d been dodging land mines in the fields of Afghanistan.
* * *
“Picasso, you’re a beauty,” Holly cooed as she brushed the onyx-colored colt. With her other hand she reached up and fingered the white star on his forehead. She had a soft spot for the handsome horse who’d been born at Horseshoe Bend Ranch during a terrible storm last summer. Although the storm had greatly damaged Main Street Church, it had served as a catalyst to bring her brother and her best friend back together as a couple. For that she would always be grateful.
Rather than sitting at home fretting about the situation with Dylan, she’d gotten in her van and headed down the road to the stables. Being able to drive gave her a sense of independence. Once she was behind the wheel, the world didn’t seem so small anymore. She didn’t feel so much like a caged bird. And she was never more centered than when she was spending time with her horses. This was where she felt most comfortable, a place where her dreams resided.
One day, she vowed, she’d get back on a horse and ride across the beautiful landscape of Horseshoe Bend Ranch. Sadly, she’d never be able to ride in the same manner as she had before the car crash—wild, spirited galloping through the countryside. But she would still be able to experience the unforgettable sensation of being at one with her horses. For the first time in a long time, she’d be free.
Malachi, who’d worked at the ranch since she was a teenager, had given her space as soon as she’d gotten out of the van, seeming to know intuitively that she was seeking solitude the moment she’d shown up. With his dark, brooding eyes, prominent cheekbones and solemn expression, he was the strong, introspective type.
A few times he stepped outside the barn and checked on her, his movements stealthy as he watched her. It was almost enough to make her smile, watching Malachi observing her when he thought she wasn’t paying attention.
Holly heard the crunch of tires on the dirt and the slam of a car door. Shuffling noises let her know someone was walking toward her. As the steps got closer and closer, she called out, “Uh-oh. I must be in trouble if the sheriff of West Falls is paying me a visit in the middle of the afternoon.”
“What in the world is going on out here?” a male voice barked.
The sound of her brother’s voice confirmed her hunch. She swiveled her head around and made eye contact with Tate, taking in his furrowed brow and the deep scowl on his face.
“Something tells me you already know.” She knew Cassidy like the back of her hand. There was a time when she’d kept secrets from Tate—things that had almost doomed their relationship. Now that they were happily engaged, Cassidy wasn’t going to hold back anything from the man she loved. She wouldn’t do it, not even for her best friend. The stern look on her brother’s face confirmed what she already suspected—Tate knew all about the circumstances surrounding Dylan’s visit.
“Cassidy was quite upset. She told me the whole story. I had to practically pry it out of her to find out what you’d said to hurt her feelings so badly.” Tate’s mouth was pinched tightly, his brown eyes narrowed into slits. “Did you seriously throw the past in her face like that?”
Holly looked away and tucked her chin against her chest. She couldn’t bear to see such disappointment in Tate’s eyes. “I messed up. Big time. What I said to her about owing me—” Heat burned her cheeks as her own words came back to her.
“—should never have