Waiting for Baby. Cathy Mcdavid
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considered what to tell him. Admitting her condition would be bad enough, especially when she’d assured him she’d been using birth control. Admitting the fact that their baby could be born deformed—if she even carried to term—was unimaginable. And grossly unfair to Jake. She knew firsthand the difficulties and potential agony facing them. He didn’t. Worse, she was taking away his choice in the matter by choosing to have the baby regardless of his feelings.
“I can’t tell him.” She swallowed another sob. “Not yet.”
“I’m your physician,” Dr. Paul said. “It’s not my place to advise you on personal matters. But as the father, he does have a right to know about the baby.”
For one wild second, Lilly contemplated hiding her pregnancy from Jake. Then she remembered her agreement to accompany the center’s clients on their visits to Bear Creek Ranch. He was no stranger to pregnant women and no dummy. He’d eventually figure out her condition and realize he was the father.
“I need some time before I make any announcements.” There was so much to consider. Her job. Her family. The expenses not covered by her health insurance. Astronomical medical bills had also contributed greatly to her marital problems with her ex-husband.
And then there was Jake.
Lilly started to rise. Her unsteady legs refused to support her, and she immediately dropped back into the chair.
“That’s a good idea. And do think about the tests. I would be remiss in my duties if I didn’t advise you to have them.” Dr. Paul handed Lilly several sheets of paper. “Take these to the front desk. The nurse will call in your prescription for prenatal vitamins.”
“Thank you.” Lilly tried again to stand and managed it this time.
“Since you’re a high-risk pregnancy, I’d like to see you every two weeks if your schedule allows it.”
Lilly nodded and stumbled out of Dr. Paul’s office. She paid her bill, scheduled her next appointment and gave the nurse the name and phone number of her pharmacy, all in a daze. The ground blurred on her walk across the parking lot to her car. She was barely aware of the return drive to the center and was surprised to find herself parked in her reserved space.
Sitting behind the steering wheel, she waited before leaving the car. Carefully, as if the slightest touch might harm the life growing inside her, she rested a hand on her abdomen.
Another baby. The last thing in the world she wanted, and, at the same time, the one thing she wanted with a longing that bordered on desperation.
A tiny seed of hope took root inside her. Was Dr. Paul right? Would this baby be born normal because the father was someone different? The tiny seed anchored itself more securely and began to blossom, filling Lilly with something she hadn’t felt since her first pregnancy.
Joy.
A smile curved the corners of her mouth. The sigh escaping her lips was one of contentment, not despair. With a sense of elation, she opened the door and stepped out of the car.
She’d done no more than place one foot on the asphalt when the first cramp hit. The second was so severe, Lilly doubled over. Her breath came in spurts.
“Oh, God,” she cried to herself. “Not again.” Then, in a whisper, she pleaded, “Please don’t take this baby from me, too.”
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