From This Day Forward. Irene Hannon
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fine. Just because their marriage had fallen apart didn’t mean they couldn’t be adult enough to treat each other with civility for a few weeks.
“Okay.”
Prepared to argue his case, Sam was taken aback by her easy acquiescence. “You’re coming?” he clarified.
“Yes.”
A surge of elation washed over him, but he did his best to maintain a steady tone as he responded. “Good. When?”
“I’m not sure. I’ll make the arrangements and let you know.”
“Will you be okay making the trip alone?”
“I’ll manage.”
Her reassurance didn’t assuage his worry. He knew how debilitating panic attacks could be—as could the other symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder. But he also knew that if he got too protective, she might back off. Even cancel her trip. And he couldn’t risk that.
“Okay. I’ll look forward to seeing you, Cara.” Try as he might, he couldn’t keep a touch of warmth from creeping into his voice. And her warning note when she responded told him she hadn’t missed it.
“I’m only looking for a place to stay, Sam. Nothing more.”
“Understood.”
“I’ll be in touch.” Without waiting for him to reply, Cara hung up.
As she picked up a now-tepid cup of tea, it suddenly occurred to her that she hadn’t thanked him for his invitation. Perhaps because she wasn’t sure he was doing her any favors, she speculated. While her visit might be precisely what she needed to start her on the road to recovery, it could also turn out to be a disaster. Time would tell, she supposed. Until then, she’d just have to put the outcome in God’s hands.
And pray she hadn’t made the biggest mistake of her life.
Chapter Three
Wiping his hands on a damp rag, Sam reached for the can of soda balanced on the rungs of the ladder. As he took a long swallow, he gave the finished bedroom a satisfied survey. In the four days since Cara had agreed to come, he’d transformed the bland, beige room into an oasis. The walls were the exact shade of aquamarine his wife favored, and he’d given the dark woodwork three coats of semigloss white enamel to brighten up the space. Once he moved in the furniture, the bedroom would be a welcoming haven.
And he wanted his wife to feel welcome…even if he couldn’t say the words.
A headache began to throb in his temples, and he moved to the window to raise the sash higher, hoping to lessen the smell of paint fumes. As he took in a deep breath of fresh air scented with new-mown grass, he recalled a conversation he’d had with Cara on their second date, after she’d teased him about his quietness.
“I was a home-schooled only child,” he’d explained as they strolled to his car after attending a concert. He’d been tempted to take her hand, but fear that she’d reject his overture had held him back. Instead, he’d stuck his hands in his pockets. “It was a very solitary upbringing. Mom was great at teaching me math and English and science, but I never had much opportunity to learn social skills.”
“Oh, I don’t know,” she’d responded, her deep green eyes sparking with mischief as she tucked her hand through his arm with a natural ease he could only envy. “You may not be the smoothest talker I’ve ever met, but you managed to get me to go out with you.”
“That was pure luck. Just like our meeting. If you hadn’t given me a megawatt smile when you came over to our table that night at the request of my date, I don’t think I would have had the guts to ask you out.”
“It took a lot more dinners before you did. How many nights in a row did you eat at the restaurant? Six?”
“Ten. And I have the credit card bill to prove it.”
“I’m sure your date rues the day she sent her compliments to the kitchen and insisted on meeting the chef.” Cara had grinned at him.
“It was just a blind date, anyway.”
“Are you serious?”
He’d felt her curious gaze and responded with a diffident shrug, hoping the lights from the shops they were passing weren’t strong enough to illuminate his face. “Yes. A well-meaning coworker was determined to beef up my lackluster social life.”
“You don’t date much?”
“No.”
“Hmm.”
“What does that mean?” He’d been at a total loss about how to interpret her response. And in truth he hadn’t been sure he wanted to. But her next words had reassured him.
“It means I’m honored you asked me out. I like you, Sam Martin. And as for the communication thing, we can work on that together, don’t you think?”
He’d agreed, Sam recalled, as he downed the last of his soda and tapped the lid of the paint can back into place. He’d have agreed to almost anything Cara asked in those days, when the heady euphoria of new love had warmed his heart and added a dazzling brightness to his days.
But with thirteen years hindsight, he knew he hadn’t held up his end of the bargain. When things had gotten tough, he’d reverted to old habits and shut down, destroying the marriage that had been the best thing in his life.
Gathering up the drop cloth and painting supplies, Sam gave the empty room one more swift scan. Soon it would be occupied by the woman he loved. Soon she would eat in his kitchen, walk through his garden, watch his television. Soon she would be back in his life.
And he intended to do everything in his power to convince her that that was where she belonged.
For always.
Flicking a glance in the rearview mirror, Cara edged into the exit lane on I-44 at Cuba, Missouri. So far, the drive had gone without a hitch. Not that she was surprised, given the brief but precise directions Sam had e-mailed her shortly after their phone conversation seven days ago. He had always been a stickler for accuracy, an attribute that had served him well as a surgeon, Cara reflected. His spare communication style, on the other hand, hadn’t mattered a great deal in his medical specialty, given the limited interaction surgeons had with patients. But it wasn’t good for establishing—or maintaining—relationships.
Recognizing that, Sam had made a concerted effort to be more communicative in the early days of their marriage, sharing both the events of his day and his feelings with her, even though that had been difficult for him. But later, as they’d grown apart, he’d gone back to his old ways, withdrawing into himself and sharing little of his life…and less of his emotions.
Once, Cara had believed she held the key to unlock his heart, that she could help him release the deeper feelings she knew were trapped inside. She’d tapped into them often enough to nourish her soul, to remind her that this often silent, solitary man loved her with an intensity that could take her breath away. Had their lives followed a different path, she felt sure they could have laid the groundwork for a solid marriage that would have endured.
But long before that foundation was established, life had intervened. Careers, commitments and demands had left neither of them with enough spare time or energy for the task. In the months preceding Sam’s tragedy, they’d become less like loving spouses and more like strangers who lived under the same roof.
Fighting back a wave of melancholy, Cara forced herself to focus on the rural Missouri landscape around her on this mid-June Sunday. Rolling hills, green fields and forested knolls created a restful ambience that was a world removed from the hustle and bustle of Philadelphia—and from the stresses of her trip, which had been magnified a hundredfold by her unsettled emotions.
Oak Hill, and its quiet Main Street, offered yet another contrast to big-city life. A mere two blocks long, it reminded her of a Norman Rockwell painting, complete