War/Peace - Part II. Clarissa Daisy Huntsman
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INT. US 12 FLIGHT 453 - RESTROOM - DAY
(CLARISSA, EMILY)
THE CAMERA GLANCES AT CLARISSA AND THEN AT THE DOOR. AGAIN WE HEAR EMILY, AND SEVERAL TAPS ON THE DOOR - LIKE A TRICKLE OF WATER INTO A STREAM. YEAH - THE CAMERA'S A LITTLE HIGH; IT CAN DETECT THE SMALLEST OF THC PARTICLES IN THE AIR. CLARISSA TILTS HER HEAD BACK AND SMILES. WE FOLLOW THE MOTION AND FEEL AS THOUGH WE'RE DIVING BACKWARDS INTO A COOL POOL.
EMILY
Clarissa, can I come in?
CLARISSA SMILES. SHE STANDS UP, PULLS THE DOOR HANDLE AND THEN PULLS EMILY INTO THE SMALL CABIN. THEN SHE SLAMS THE DOOR.
EMILY SHAKES HER HEAD.
EMILY
Whoa! Clarissa, I don't think this is a good idea. We're on a plane.
CLARISSA
Just one joint, babe. Wanna share?
CLARISSA HOLDS THE BLUNT IN THE AIR AND FIDDLES WITH IT LIKE IT'S A PEN AND SHE'S ABOUT TO WRITE A SONG. EMILY DECIDES TO SING ALONG. SHE LOCKS THE DOORS, LOOPS A LOCK OF HAIR WITH A LITTLE FINGER AND LAUGHS LIGHTLY. THEN SHE TAKES THE JOINT AND PROCEEDS TO GET LIGHTLY HIGH.
CLARISSA
Stanley's quite a free spirit wouldn't you say?
EMILY
Yeah. He's sweet.
CLARISSA
Wanna ask him to join the mile high club for me sis? I know they say you shouldn't mix alcohol with weed . . . like, remember my 20th? I got so totally wasted . . .
EMILY
How can I forget? You're such the sexy vixen aren't you?
CLARISSA
Run life fast enough and it ain't gonna get you down, you ain't gonna fall. Sex, drugs, rock n roll; we got the dope, we had the dope Mraz track, now I need the bloke. Get out there, girl, now and score me some.
EMILY SMILES AND STANDS.
CLARISSA
Whoa! Check your breath. Don't want the flight attendants thinkin' something's up. Ha. Up. Oh - and spray on some of my Hello Kitty [1.].
CLARISSA TOSSES EMILY THE BOTTLE. EMILY CATCHES IT AND SPRAYS SOME OF THE PERFUME UNDER EACH OF HER ARMS.
EMILY
Here goes.
EMILY POPS A MINT INTO HER MOUTH - XXX [2.] -, BITES IT, AND BENDS DOWN. SHE BLOWS INTO CLARISSA'S FACE. CLARISSA SMILES AND NODS.
EMILY
Wish me luck.
CLARISSA
You won't need it.
EMILY SMILES, TAKES A DEEP BREATH, TILTS HER HEAD TO ONE SIDE, AND LEAVES THE RESTROOM.
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1 Hello Kitty Fragrance (http://www.sephora.com/browse/product.jhtml?id=P276338)
2 XXX Extra Strong Mints (http://www.canyouhandlethem.co.uk/)
3 The Vibe - Kero One and Niamaj (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wlhAUbbvvXg)
4 Do It - Bucky Jonson, Golden, Nic Nac, and 777 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M8OHiBmLH68)
5 Wild Ones - Flo Rida and Sia (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xScsmPyspLg)
6 Under The Influence [Chorus only] – Eminem (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aW8NRI81yaU)
7 Theron, C. [Actress], Oswalt, P. [Actor], Cody, D. [Writer], & Reitman, J. [Director] (2011). Young Adult. Los Angeles, California: Paramount Pictures.
8 Harold and Kumar - Smoking on the plane (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gs6gFPFdOhQ)
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INT. US 12 FLIGHT 453 - DAY
(EMILY, FLIGHT ATTENDANT (MALE), BUS GUY)
EMILY EMERGES FROM THE RESTROOM AND QUICKLY CLOSES THE DOOR BEHIND HER. A MALE FLIGHT ATTENDANT APPROACHES HER.
FLIGHT ATTENDANT
Is everything ok, mam? The lady looked rather nervous when she entered the restroom.
EMILY SMILES.
EMILY
Yes. She is nervous. Excited also. Um . . . got a strange question for you . . .
EMILY PULLS A TWENTY OUT OF HER POCKET.
EMILY
You wouldn't happen to keep any condoms on board would you? Like - my friend and her boyfriend are . . . you know.
THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT BREATHES A SIGH OF RELIEF. EMILY LAUGHS.
SHE SMILES SWEETLY AND TILTS HER HEAD THE WAY IT WASN'T.
FLIGHT ATTENDANT
Not sure if I should be doing this but follow me.
EMILY TRACES THE ATTENDANT'S PATH.
FLIGHT ATTENDANT
Make sure she sprays the room after . . .
EMILY
She smells as sweet as I do. Don't tell me you wouldn't love to go in there afterwards? Far better than after someone's taken a crap.
FLIGHT ATTENDANT
Ha ha. Well, I can assure you I won't be sneaking in post session.
EMILY SMILES HER MISCHIEVOUS SMILE.
EMILY
Really? You know you want to. Ha ha. I'll be keeping my eye on you.
THE ATTENDANT HANDS EMILY A STRIP OF CONDOMS - MAYBE SIX.
FLIGHT ATTENDANT
Hope they're a good size. They're all we have.
EMILY SHOWS THE GUY THE TWENTY.
FLIGHT ATTENDANT
They're on the house . . . plane. But tell your friends to keep it down, ok?
EMILY
Yeah. Ha ha. But only the noise. Thanks dude.
EMILY MAKES HER WAY TO STANLEY AND THE CAMERA FOLLOWS CLOSE BEHIND.
STANLEY TURNS AROUND.
BUS GUY
Is everything ok Emily?
EMILY
Just fine Stanley.
EMILY BENDS DOWN TO WHISPER INTO STANLEY'S EAR. SHE SLIPS THE CONDOMS INTO HIS POCKET.
EMILY
Clarissa needs you right now Stan. How do you feel about that?
BUS GUY
Sure. Do I go see her?
EMILY
She's horny Stan.
STANLEY TAKES A DEEP BREATH.
BUS GUY
Really?
EMILY
You good? You up?
STANLEY NODS. HE'S SPEECHLESS. HE STANDS.
EMILY
What you need is in your pocket. If anyone asks, you're her boyfriend. Yeah.
AGAIN