Crystal Garden. Ewa Bash
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a mess. In short, he looked like a completely ordinary teenager.
“Hey, duuude,” drawled the guy, smiling from ear to ear and patting Sunny on the shoulder.
“This is Walter,” Sunny said to introduce me.
The guy nodded and closed the door. Meanwhile, Sunny took off his jacket and walked into the living room. I hesitated a bit in the hallway. I looked at my reflection in the huge mirror that hung on the wall. I was regretting my decision to come here, and it was written on my face. My pupils we almost like Sunny’s, except I was not stoned.
The apartment clearly belonged to rich people. In the beautiful, expensively furnished living room were several teenagers. Two more guys and three girls. They were about my age and well-dressed. These were the sort of teens that would usually be referred to as “gilded youth”; children of rich parents who have everything but have no idea how to entertain themselves. Oh, Sunny, how did you get here? We did not belong in this circle. We weren’t bought expensive cars and apartments in the city for our birthdays.
They were happy to see Sunny. The girls immediately fell around his neck. I felt a twinge of jealousy. After Sunny finished his welcome hugs and kisses, he remembered that I was still standing beside him. He began to introduce me, but I didn’t even try to remember their names. I already hated them. I envied them. I could barely save enough money to buy a motorbike, and they had everything. Of course, Sunny wouldn’t turn down the opportunity to be part of this society. Was it good for him? No. On the other hand, I wasn’t much of a friend either, if he preferred this company to mine.
They were drinking cocktails, smoking, laughing, discussing recent parties, and planning holidays amongst other stuff. I just sat there and watched. I had nothing to say to them, even if I wanted to. I saw them getting drunk and I felt disgusted. I leaned back in the chair and closed my eyes. I was dizzy from the cigarette smoke.
I must have dozed off, as I was brought back to consciousness by a scream. The scream came from one of the girls. She was writhing in hysterics and one of the guys was holding her and trying to shut her mouth. She was pointing at the other girl who was slowly slipping off the couch until she was standing with one knee on the floor and was holding on to the coffee table. She was incredibly pale and seemed to be suffocating. Sunny was gently supporting her. He slowly and carefully laid the girl on the floor. She was shivering, but I wasn’t certain if she was still conscious. She stared in front of her, but seemed to see nothing. Another guy felt her pulse. I rushed to them, but the third guy pushed me aside. He had some kind of syringe in his hand. Sunny rose to his feet, gave way to the guy and grabbed me by the elbow. He was pulling me to the door.
“Come, we should leave,” he said. “They know what to do. Come. Nobody should see us here.”
Sunny slipped my jacket over my shoulders and practically pushed me out of the door. I was trying to resist and couldn’t take my eyes off what was happening in the living room. Everyone was crowded around the girl, and as I glanced back, I saw a pale hand on the green carpet. It appeared to be completely lifeless.
4
The next day, Sunny didn’t show up at school, so I decided to leave before the end of my classes and go to his house. Sunny opened the door almost immediately. He looked ill and exhausted, barefoot, shirtless, and was wearing old sweat pants. He looked around, as if to check that I hadn’t been followed, then let me in. Without a word, he walked into the living room and sat down on the couch. I took off my jacket and went after him. Sunny picked up the remote control and began to channel surf. He seemed scared, concerned, perhaps even desperate. He was tapping his fingers on the back of the couch and biting his lower lip.
“Are you alone?” I asked. He nodded nervously, still staring at the TV screen. I stood between him and the TV. He leaned to the side to see what was happening on the screen. It was more of a mechanical move than a sign of real interest.
“What happened to her?” I asked. He slowly raised his head, looked at me and bit his lip as if pondering what to say.
“She’s in intensive care,” he said finally.
“Will she survive?” I asked.
“Gosh, I don’t know, Walter!” He threw the TV remote and rose from the couch. “If they find out that we were there, we’ll have a big problem.” He began to pace the room.
“You’re worried about us?” I asked after a short pause.
“Of course!” he replied, his voice full of despair. “And you’re not?”
“That girl almost died right in front of your eyes, and your biggest concern is that someone might find out we were there?” I was frustrated. I still couldn’t shake the image of her motionless hand from my mind.
“To hell with her, she’s a stupid… uh,” Sunny waved his hand.
“What’s wrong with you?” I went up to him, grabbed him by the shoulders and began to shake. “Who are you, and where is Sunny? Huh?”
He pushed me away and sat on the edge of the coffee table.
“What can I do? How can I help her? Everyone seemed to be out for themselves, and only thinking about saving their own skin.”
“Why the hell do you need all of this?” I asked.
“This?” he questioned.
“This!” I threw up my hands, “drunken parties, drugs …”
“Dude, it’s cool!”
“What’s cool? I saw that girl. Oh, she was cool alright, deathly cool. Why on earth did you want me to come with you yesterday?”
“I wanted to show you real life.”
“Real life? C’mon, you call this a ‘life’?” I was shocked. What had happened to him over the last six months?
“It’s cool, it’s fun, it’s exciting!” He got up and came up to me. “It’s much more interesting than sitting at home every evening with stupid comics.”
“They’re not stupid,” I said through clenched teeth.
“And why the hell do you draw those stupid pictures?” He came too close.
“Because I like to,” I answered.
“And I do what I like.” he said as he walked away from me.
“But I doubt that I will end up like that girl with my stupid pictures,” I said under my breath.
“And I don’t care,” he shouted back. “I don’t care what happens to me. But at least I have experienced life!”
“Life, yeah,” I laughed sarcastically.
“Yeah, life. I take everything I want, and you can’t even come close to Annie. You’re a loser!” He spat out his words.
“Take a look at yourself.”
I grabbed my jacket and went out onto the porch. I was trying to fasten my zip, but couldn’t manage it. I was beside myself with anger and resentment. What happened to him? We were the best of friends. We had always understood each other without even needing to speak, so what now? The gulf between us was growing wider and wider. Damn! I pulled the zip again and pressed my fist to my mouth. I wanted to scream, but then I felt Sunny’s hand on my shoulder. I turned around and saw him standing barefoot on the cold porch and looking at me.
“I’m sorry,” he said quietly.
We went back into the house.
“I can’t control myself,” he explained as he sat on the couch with his elbows resting on his knees. “I lose my temper and hurt people who are close to me, but I don’t want to. Damn!”
“I’m not angry with you,” I said. “I just want to be a part of your life, whatever that is.” I was standing in front of him with my hands in my jacket pockets. “You are my only friend.”
“You’re mine too.” he replied.
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