How To Be the Perfect Girlfriend. Heather Macallister
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blinked. “Moo.”
“This is not helping,” Sara said.
“What did you expect?” Missy speared a tomato wedge in her salad so hard she broke a tine on her plastic fork.
“I was hoping for help in attracting men from Hayden and figuring out which ones to attract and how to keep them from you.”
Missy got all huffy. “I can attract men! But I’m engaged, so I choose not to.”
“Right,” Hayden said.
“I can!” Missy glanced around, then peeled off her sweater revealing a tight black sleeveless shell. Then she turned her diamond engagement ring around to hide the stone.
Sara had no idea how big the diamond was, only that when the light caught the stone and it flashed, the reflection left a blue-green dot in her vision.
After fluffing her blond hair and throwing back her shoulders, Missy waited a couple of beats, then picked up the broken fork and gasped. “Oh, no! My fork broke!”
Oh, please. Sara rolled her eyes so hard she felt the muscles twinge.
And yet, there was an instant response. “Here, take mine,” said a man from the next table at the same moment another passing by handed her one from his tray.
“Here you go.” Then he just stood there.
Smiling widely, Missy took the fork. “Why, aren’t you both so sweet,” she gushed as only a Texas belle could.
“I need a fork, too,” Sara said. No one even blinked. But then, she hadn’t expected them to.
Missy held the attention of the men with her smile long enough to make her point, then released them by turning back to her salad. The man with the tray looked as if he wanted to linger, so Missy tucked her hair behind her ear, the flashing diamond visible once more.
Very neatly done. Disappointment crossed the man’s face and he left. Missy shrugged back into her sweater.
“Not bad,” admitted Hayden. “Just don’t try going one on one with me.”
“I doubt that’ll happen.” Missy’s voice was lethally sweet. “We don’t move in the same social circles.”
“I’m not moving in any social circles!” Sara dropped her head to the table. “I give up.”
“But you haven’t started yet,” Missy said.
“What’s the point? I’ll never be able to stop men in their tracks the way you and Hayden do.”
“But do you truly want to?” Hayden asked.
Sara raised her head just high enough to prop it on her fist. “Maybe not stop so much as slow them down.”
“And then what?” Missy asked.
“What do you mean ‘and then what’?”
“What are you going to do with them when you’ve got them?”
“Well, I don’t know. I was hoping we could talk about that after I found somebody.”
“I think that’s been your problem. We should be talking about afterward before.”
“Huh?”
Missy reached into her wedding tote, withdrew a Palm Pilot and unfolded a keyboard for it. “You need a goal and a plan to reach it.” She looked at Hayden. “Am I right?”
“Yes.” Hayden crossed her arms over her chest and watched the parade of men coming down the escalator. “Much as I hate to admit it.”
Missy’s fingers were poised over the keyboard. “So, what do you want, Sara?”
Well, this was it and she’d better pay attention. “I want a man who’s interested in making a life with me.”
Missy started typing. “Marriage.”
Hayden snorted.
“Or at least long-term devotion. Long-term enough for me to decide if I want it to lead to marriage,” Sara added because she didn’t want to completely alienate Hayden with marriage talk. “Certainly a better caliber of man.”
“What kind of man do you want?” Hayden asked, as though it were that simple.
“The perfect man, of course,” Sara said flippantly.
“Then you’ll have to become the perfect woman.” Missy was serious.
“Oh, sure. Why didn’t I think of that? I’ll get right on it.” Sara slapped her hands on the table and looked around the atrium. “Anybody seen my fairy godmother?”
“Snippy, snippy.” Melissa typed something.
“Calm down, Sara.” Hayden stopped casing the escalator for men and closed her plastic salad container. “Perfection is the way you define it. Missy has her idea of the perfect man, I have mine and you should have yours.”
“And then you have to become his match.” Missy eyed her, then typed some more.
Sara eyed Missy right back. “Now, wait a minute—I am not becoming one of those women who completely changes herself for a man.”
“All we’re saying is if you want a pilot, you hang out around airplanes. You don’t want a bowler, then stay out of bowling alleys.” Hayden leaned sideways trying to see what Missy was typing.
“Oh.” That made sense.
“Good Lord, she’s started a spreadsheet.” Hayden grinned at Sara. “You should see what’s in the ‘improvements’ column.”
“Sara said she wanted to upgrade her men.”
“I just thought you’d teach me a secret handshake and tell me to wear a padded bra,” Sara grumbled. Why had she thought this would be as simple as a few tips over lunch?
“Excuse me!” Missy gestured to her chest. “There is nothing padded here. That’s…that’s false advertising.”
“There is nothing false about my advertising, honey,” Hayden snapped.
“Hello?” Sara waved her hands. “Me? Focus on me!”
Hayden grabbed her hands. “Nails.”
“Oh, I know,” Missy tut-tutted. “Acrylic?”
“Hmm.” Both Hayden and Missy looked at Sara.
She pulled her hands away and resisted the urge to sit on them.
Hayden laughed. “Let’s just go for groomed right now.”
“Oh, thanks a lot.”
“What about her hair?” Missy tossed her mane of one hundred and fifty dollar highlights over her shoulder. “Except I really shouldn’t fill that in if she wants a low-maintenance man.”
Sara wasn’t sure, but she thought there was an insult in there.
“Sara, you’re going to have to give us specifics on the kind of man you want.” Missy waited expectantly.
“Well…he should be kind, honest and have a sense of humor—”
“Yeah, yeah, we all want those.” Hayden made a hurry-up gesture. “Add sexy.” She smiled at Sara. “My little gift to you.”
“I’m going to type all those in,” Missy said. “Later, you’ll have to rank the traits.”
“What is this?” Even though she’d asked for help, she hadn’t expected them to be quite this helpful. “Are you running a dating service?”
Missy ignored her. “Possible professions?”
“I don’t know—professional.”