Life & Love. Lisa Messenger
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who could walk like a man and talk like a man (unless you happen to like shoulder pads, in which case, embrace that aspect).
I’ve been exploring the notion of masculine and feminine energy over the past few years. I am absolutely no expert and am figuring it out as I go, from observing, feeling and experiencing, but I think it’s an important topic and I delve into it in this book because I spent so many years confused by the dual genders of my personality, the meek and the macho, the beauty and the beast.
I knew I was a strong, independent woman who could get (almost) whatever I wanted in the world, but at the same time I craved companionship and protection. I could kick arse in a boardroom with even the most intimidating corporate honcho, but I cried at romantic movies and when I came down with the flu, all I wanted was a caring partner to bring me chicken soup.
What I’ve learned is you can be soft and successful. You can be in love and ambitious. You can thrive on the adrenaline of business meetings but also enjoy having the car door opened for you.
You can be a traditionalist and a rebel, a lover and a fighter, vulnerable and invincible. In fact, that complex, confusing mixture of characteristics will only make you a better, more creative and likeable entrepreneur.
These pages are full of snippets and tidbits from my own personal journey, written from my heart, from one seeker to another. I truly believe we have a choice. We can choose happiness. And one thing I know for sure is that once you choose it and equip yourself with the tools to navigate to it, then the serendipity, synchronicity and the people, events and things you attract into your life as a result are beyond anything you could have ever imagined possible.
You don’t need to be an entrepreneur or have any entrepreneurial intentions at all to benefit from this book. I wrote it for anyone with a yearning and anyone whose life feels a little off balance – we’ve all been there. Maybe you’re a mum in the deep west who wants to experience more contentment, or a high-flying lawyer at a big corporation who wants to reconnect with her soul. Maybe you’re already running a successful start-up and are constantly reassessing or tweaking your personal life to match the ride. I’ve learned there’s never a full stop on self-development, there’s always room for improvement.
I am not a guru and have never heralded myself as such. I am not qualified in much other than business. I’m just a country girl from Coolah, a town 495km from a big city. I didn’t have anything handed to me on a silver spoon. I just chased after a dream and purposefully put myself in front of people who could enable me. I am an entrepreneur for entrepreneurs, but firstly I am a daughter, a partner and a friend. At the end of the day, I have a wealth of experience from the school of this thing we call life – and I’m more than happy to share it.
I want you to have it all, feel it all and experience it all too. This book is a beautiful indulgence about the things I have learned that have helped shape who I am, with the hope that it may help others navigate an increasingly competitive, crazy, fast-paced world full of pressures. I’m bursting at the seams to share my journey and inspire you to live your best life. Out loud. To be the best version of yourself. To be happy. Unapologetically.
My message is always this: anything is possible. Since launching The Collective just over two years ago, I have experienced things I never imagined in my wildest dreams. If this former basket case can have it all, then you can too. This is some of the journey. Thanks for travelling it with me, being bold and courageous and inspiring me every day. This is for you.
If you didn’t know already, you will learn over the next few chapters that I am all about transparency. I am an open book (literally. You’re on page 16 of it). So before we get into the nitty gritty topics of Life & Love, I wanted to give you a behind-the-scenes sneak peek at our cover shoot. Because, well, it was hilarious. You see that glossy, glowing, glamorous photograph of me on the front cover? I don’t wake up every morning and climb out of bed looking like that. Being daring and disruptive, I seem to attract a certain kind of madness wherever I go, so transforming me into a cover star was, as always, a fun and crazy journey. Oh, where to begin?
As with my first book in this series, Daring & Disruptive, I did think twice about splashing my face across so many pages (me, me, me?) but I’m a visual person and the thought of a book full of black font on white paper really didn’t excite me. Plus, although I’m not a prima donna, I wanted an excuse to dress up as a princess for the day, hang out with my friends in a park, frolic in the grass and generally muck around, all under the guise of work!
Unfortunately my choice of location – Sydney’s Centennial Park because I love nature, fresh air and earthiness – isn’t exactly convenient for a photo shoot. Think about it: no power plugs for the photographer’s equipment, no mirrors for hair and make-up, a lot of people everywhere, a flock of geese who made a bee-line for me and a hundred outside factors that we couldn’t control, from weather worries to bats pooing on my dress.
Yes, this happened. I was posing on a bridge, looked up, and a whole colony decided to bomb me. Not ideal when the designer dress in question is borrowed…
I should probably pretend that everything went smoothly to plan, a seamless, flawless operation. But I’m not about smoke and mirrors, and I’m happy for you to laugh at my mishaps. (Side note: to my wonderful crew, Scott my photographer, Lydia my stylist, Lei my make-up artist and their assistants, your staying power, resilience, capability and sense of humour are astounding and you could bring calmness to a cyclone.)
Let’s just say I lived up to the title Daring & Disruptive when we descended on the park that Saturday. From my choice of ‘changing room’ (the side of the road, next to a 12-man cricket team and a bunch of their friends, who definitely got more than an eyeful) to my dog Benny coming over all fame-hungry and refusing to get out of any of the shots (after jumping into the muddy lake so he walked out looking like he had long black socks on – I’m so pleased I spent so long preening him to within an inch of his life beforehand).
What you can’t see is that many of the dresses, which were too big for me, are held together at the back by rubber bands from our sushi lunch order and oversized bulldog clips. Also the horse you’ll see later on. Well, it seemed like such a good idea to shoot myself resplendent on a horse – my first-ever job was as a horse riding instructor and I grew up in the country riding every day, so it was a poetic nod to my past. Unfortunately, the horse we borrowed was a little feisty. I was also wearing a giant tulle skirt, had a broken toe (that’s a story for later) and had failed to mention I hadn’t actually been on a (non-trail ride) horse for about 10 years. My favourite photo of the shoot is my crew cowering behind a nearby Mercedes Benz, which I was lucky I didn’t land on and go through the windscreen, quite frankly, as I tried to cling to a “hangry” horse (apparently he missed lunch) that was bucking and running in circles. Said horse also had a role in The Great Gatsby. I bet it was better behaved for Baz Luhrmann.
But do you know what? Despite the chaos, despite indecently exposing myself to a sports team, getting pooped on by wildlife and remembering why you should never work with animals, I wouldn’t change anything about this shoot. I wanted to be photographed on a backdrop that reflected who I am, and that’s certainly what I got. I am fun, chaotic, spontaneous, unexpected, full of surprises and just a little bit wild sometimes. In business, people can become so confined by how they should behave, by how events should roll out. But there is no point writing an entire book about being the fullest, bravest, biggest version of yourself, and then having a photo shoot