To Have And To Hold. Myrna Mackenzie
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said and suddenly felt like spilling his guts and telling her everything about his disastrous marriage and Margaret’s infidelity.
She shrugged. “I suppose.”
It wasn’t the response he hoped for. “You don’t believe that?”
“I think … I think someone with four children wouldn’t really know what I feel.”
He stood up and walked to the stairs, turning around to face her with his hands on his hips. “And you once accused me of being arrogant,” he said pointedly.
“What does that mean?”
“It means that you didn’t corner the market on lousy relationships.”
“I didn’t say I had.”
“But you imply it,” he said quietly, completely frustrated. “I’m not going to pretend to fully grasp what it must have been like for you to lose your baby … or how it feels knowing you might never have another child. But despite what you might think, I do know a bit about disappointment … and loss.”
Her blue eyes shone. “Because of your wife?”
“Because I married a woman I didn’t love and who didn’t love me,” he replied. “And she spent the next ten years punishing us both for it. But I stuck with it because I’d made a commitment and I felt I owed my children a chance at a normal life with parents who stayed together.” Noah dropped his arms to his sides. “It was a train wreck from the very beginning.”
“But you stayed?”
“I stayed for the kids,” he said honestly. “They needed me.”
She stood up and reached him in a couple of steps. “You were right to stay,” she said. “For Lily’s sake especially. She’s afraid, you know. Afraid you might leave.”
Noah’s chest hurt. “She said that to you?”
“She implied it. I think Lily is frightened things are changing.”
“Change is inevitable, though.”
Callie nodded. “I suppose. I’m not an expert on teenage girls, Noah, but I was one once. And in a way I understand what Lily is feeling. My father was sick for a long time before he died. And even though I knew my mom wasn’t sick and wouldn’t die, too, part of me always feared that she might. So maybe you simply need to talk to Lily and tell her you’re not going anywhere.”
Strange how good it felt to talk to her about Lily. The years of going it alone had been lonely ones. He could easily imagine Callie at his side, every day, every night. “Thank you for caring about Lily.”
“I do care,” she said quietly and looked away.
Noah stepped closer and took hold of her chin, lifting her face up. “But you’re not sure you want to, right?”
“Honestly … being around you makes me more confused than I’ve ever been in my life.” Her hands found his chest. “Would you … would you like to stay for a while?”
“Yeah,” he breathed. “But I have to pick the kids up before three.”
“Oh.” Disappointment etched on her face.
“Evie’s got guests arriving at two,” he explained. “And my folks are golfing all day.”
She moved her fingertips. “Another time, then?”
He grasped her shoulders and looked at her. “I want to stay with you.” He pulled her close and her hands were imprisoned between them. “Believe me.” One hand moved over her shoulder and he gently touched the back of her neck and tilted her head fractionally. “I want to make love to you so much I can barely think about anything else.” Especially after what had happened between them down by the river. “I’ll call you later,” he said, kissing her. “And of course I’ll see you tomorrow, for Lily’s lesson.”
“Of course,” she whispered.
He kissed her again and the feel and taste of her was imprinted all over his skin. And Noah knew, without a doubt, that he wanted to love her for the rest of his life.
Only, he had no idea if Callie wanted the same thing.
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