A Place Called Home. Eleanor Jones
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reached out to still her fingers, covering her hand with his.
“We’re both grown adults, Ellie, and we need to talk because as far as I can see, we’re going nowhere.”
She looked up at him, meeting disappointment in his eyes.
“Do you love me, Matt?” she asked on impulse.
His hand dropped away.
“Do you love me is perhaps more to the point.”
“I thought I did...”
“Until when, Ellie? What changed?”
She sighed heavily. “I don’t know. It’s just—”
“That we both seem to want different things,” he finished for her.
“And what do you want of me?” she asked.
His voice was full of passion. “I want you to be the same person I thought I met,” he said. “The person I got engaged to.”
“But I am that same person.”
“No, you’re not. You were fun loving and up for anything when I met you.” He drained his glass. “Now all you seem to want to do is paint...and go off for days in the country to get new material. When is the last time we went to a club, for instance? We used to go out all the time. And now you’re talking about going back home to sort your dad’s farm out. You never bothered before, so why now?”
“Maybe I’ve just grown up, Matt. Maybe I’ve realized there’s more to life than clubbing.”
He reached forward, taking hold of her chin with his thumb and forefinger. His touch was gentle. “The answer to your question is yes. I suppose I’ll always love you, Ellie, in a way, but it’s not enough anymore. We’re not on the same page.”
“And I still really care about you, but I feel that way, too,” she admitted.
He smiled, and Ellie thought she saw relief in his expression.
“Then I think we should have a break for a while, a total break, so that we can both decide where we are. You can go and do your country thing and I’ll meet up with some of my old friends again...catch up on what I’ve been missing.”
In a sudden flutter of panic, Ellie reached out to take hold of his hand, clutching it tightly in both of hers.
“Are you trying to tell me that we’re over?”
“I suppose I am... Is that a problem?”
Ellie shook her head slowly, staring at the man she had once intended to spend the rest of her life with. The panic faded and she withdrew her hands. “You may as well have this back then,” she said quietly, sliding off her diamond ring.
“No!” His objection was immediate, from the heart. “I never said I wanted the ring back.”
“What do you want then, Matt?”
“I told you... A proper break.”
“We’re over, Matt. I think we both know that.”
Taking the ring, he pressed it against her palm, closing his fingers around her hand.
“Don’t wear it, then. Just keep it for a while, say a couple of weeks or so. And then we’ll meet up again. If you’ve got this country thing out of your system...”
“Country thing!” Her voice was cold, her hands shaking. “I was born in the country, Matt.”
“Yes, and you hated it. That’s why you moved to the city.”
“No, I never hated the country. I just couldn’t stand the memories it held for me.”
“Exactly,” he declared. “And now you’ve changed. I loved the crazy girl I met, you see, but it feels as if she’s gone.”
“I’m still me, Matt. Aren’t you supposed to love me for myself?”
“And I’m still me. I’ve never made a secret of who I am.”
“So you’re saying that I have?”
Matt’s jaw tightened. “No,” he responded. “Of course not—well, not intentionally, anyway.”
Ellie stood up, reaching for her bag and slinging it over her shoulder.
“I guess it’s goodbye, then.”
An acute sense of loss dragged through her chest as she kissed him on the cheek. He grabbed her arm, pulling her down to press his lips fiercely against hers.
“For now,” he murmured, releasing her. “Ring me when you’re ready.”
As she walked out of the bar, into the golden light of the late evening sun, Ellie’s sense of loss was replaced with a glimmer of excitement. She would never be ready to get back with Matt, she knew that now. There was so much to think about, so many memories still to relive. So many pictures to paint...beginning with Blue’s.
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