Brains Confounded by the Ode of Abū Shādūf Expounded. Yūsuf al-Shirbīnī
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by me sat Son-of-Puppy and Eat-Shit,
And Son-of-the-Constable, while I exuded odors.
—in other words, he sat next to the shaykhs of the village, that is to say, those already mentioned; there is nothing to be gained by repeating their names. I have devoted a work to their nuptials, so consult that.
٢٧،٢
ثمّ إنّهم عند الصباحيّه * يجتمعوا المشاة في الظُهْريّه * ويجعلوا بينهم وبين العريس حكومه * لا قدر لها ولا قيمه * ويجتمعوا مع بعضهم البعض * ويرمحوا بالطول والعرض * ويقولوا حَكَمْنا عليك يا فلان * قوم هات العيش والمِشّ ورطل دخان * ويأكلوا وينطّوا * ويشيلوا ويحطّوا * ويأتوا بحجارة للدخان مثل أرباع الكيل * ويصيروا في عياط وشياط إلى الليل * ويسمّوا هذا اليوم يوم الهُروبه * وأمورهم كلّها مقلوبه * وبعد ثلاثة أيّام * يُخْرِجوا العروسة بالتمام * ويكشفوا وجهها ثاني مرّه * ويجعلوها للناس شُهره * ويأخذوا أيضًا النُقوط من الناس * وأحوالهم في أعكاس
On the morning after the marriage, the foot soldiers gather around noon and hold a sort of trial—null and void—with the groom. They gather all together and gallivant hither and thither and say, “So-and-so, our sentence is pronounced! Go fetch the bread and mishsh and a pound of tobacco!”74 Then they eat and they leap and they hurry and they scurry and they bring pipe bowls as big as cups for measuring grain, and the uproar goes on until night. This they call the Day of Escape—but all their doings are out of shape. Then, three days later, they bring the bride out and uncover her face a second time, making a public spectacle of her and taking money from people too—their affairs are indeed perverse, through and through.
(ذكر وقائعهم)
An Account of Their Escapades
Anecdotes Showing that a Man Cannot Escape His Inborn Nature
١،٣
(حُكِيَ أنّ بعض الملوك خرج هو ووزيره قاصدًا لتنَزُّه) فمرّ على رجل فلاح يحرث وعلى رأسه لبدة مشرمطة ولابس خلقة مقطّعة ترى عورته منها وقد حصره البول فبال عليها حتّى غرقها ولم يبال بالنجاسة وقد اسودّ قفاه من الحرّ وتشقّقت قدماه من الحفا وشدّة البرد وهو في حالة مُكْرِبة فقال الملك لوزيره ما حال هذا الرجل فقال له يا ملك هذا من فلّاحين الريف ينشأ الشخص منهم على التعب والنصب والهمّ والغمّ والطرد والجري وقلّة الدين والجهل ولا يجد من يرشده للعبادة والصلاة فيصير في هذه الحالة كما ترى فهم هَمَج الهَمَج لا يعرفون غير الثور والمحراث فحُكْمهم حُكْم البهائم والكلاب قال الشاعر [طويل]
| مَنْ فَاتَهُ العِلْمُ وأَخْطاهُ الغِنَى | فَذاكَ وَالكَلْبُ عَلَى حَدٍّ سَوَا |
فقال الملك لوزيره ألا ترى إذا أخذناه وعلّمناه القرآن وأشغلناه بالعلم وألبسناه ملابس النُعْم يتغيّر طبعه ويرقّ قلبه وتخفّ ذاته وينتقل من طَوْر الكثافة إلى طَوْر اللطافة فقال الوزير أيّد الله الملك وأدام بقاه أما سمعت قول الشاعر [سريع]
| لا يَخْرُجُ الإِنْسانُ مِنْ طَبْعِهِ | حَتَّى يَعُودَ الدَرُّ في ضَرْعِهِ |
| مَنْ كان مِنْ جُمَّيْزةٍ أَصلُهُ | لا يَنْبُتُ التُفّاحُ في فَرْعِهِ |
وقال آخر [بسيط]
| الطَّبْعُ وَالرُّوحُ مَخْلوقانِ١ في جَسَدٍ | لا يَنْفَدُ الطَّبْعُ حَتَّى تَنْفَدُ الرُّوحُ |
وقال بعضهم يحول عن وَكْره ولا يحول عن طبعه وفي الحديث إذا حُدِّثْتُمْ أنّ جبلًا زال عن مكانه فصدّقوا وإذا حُدِّثْتُمْ أنّ رجلًا زال عن طبعه فلا تصدّقوا
١ بي: قد خُلِقا في جسد؛ ب: في جسم قد خلقا؛ ك: قد خلقات (كذا) في جسد؛ ب وم: قد خلقان (كذا) في جسد.
The story is told that a certain king went out with his minister to take the air and came upon a peasant plowing. On his head was a tattered cap, and he wore a single torn garment through which his privates could be seen. He had been overtaken by a sudden need to relieve himself and had urinated on this garment till it was soaked but paid no heed to this defilement. The back of his neck had turned black from the heat, his feet were chapped from walking barefoot and from the cold, and he was altogether in a pitiful state. “What ails the man?” the king asked his minister, who replied, “King, this is a peasant of the countryside, one of those who are raised to hardship and sickness, woe and worry, hurry and scurry, ignorance and neglect of religion, and who find no one to direct them towards worship and prayer. Thus, they turn out as you see, the most savage of savages, ignorant of everything but the ox and the plow, and indistinguishable from beasts and dogs. As the poet75 says:
Whom knowledge has passed by and riches shunned,
He and the dogs are on a par.”
The king said to the minister, “Don’t you think that, if we took him and taught him the Qurʾan and set him to studying and dressed him in fine clothes, his nature would change, his heart soften, and his personal appearance become more agreeable, so that he would be translated from the domain of coarseness to that of refinement?” “God save the king,” the minister responded, “and send him long life! Have you not heard the words of the poet:
Man will not escape his nature
Till