The Life and Letters of the Rev. George Mortimer, M.A. John Armstrong
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Assure Mrs. A. of my kind regards. Much as I admire your faith and self-denial, I think that of your dear partner no less conspicuous. When God has work to be done, how sweetly can he influence our minds so as to make us co-workers with himself.
Believe me,
Your most affectionate though unworthy Friend,
G. M.
Mr. Mortimer was married February 21st, 1812, to Miss Barford, a lady of pious habits and of amiable manners, and who proved herself a most useful and affectionate helpmeet to him. In the view of this event, he prepared, some months before it took place, the following resolutions for his government in the married state:—
“Since it is very probable I shall soon be united with my dearest friend M. B., and since we are always in danger of overlooking the duties of each relation in life, while engaged in it, though, before we enter upon it, we may perceive them plainly enough, I would, therefore, now, in an humble dependence upon Almighty God, and as in his sight, set my hand to the following resolutions, which I would purpose never to swerve from upon any occasion, let it be ever so trivial:—
“1st. Since the grand secret of domestic comfort depends upon the regulation of our tempers, I would, in the first place, endeavour to keep a strict watch over these; would avoid pettishness, of every description, and would guard against a degree of pertinacity, which has always been more or less troublesome to me: would never be positive in argument, and will strive to remove every appearance of self-will, and never to oppose my dearest friend in any thing, excepting when duty imperiously calls; and even then, in such a manner as shall impress her more with an idea of my affectionate regards towards her, than of any wish to consult my own gratification.
“In the 2nd place: will cultivate a tender and affectionate manner, always seeking out means of promoting her comfort, and lessening her troubles; sharing every domestic and maternal anxiety with tender solicitude.
“In the 3rd place: will be completely open; will have no secrets; on the contrary, will consult her in everything; will give her the freest access to all my papers, letters, &c.; will also commit to her entire management all my money concerns; and will take no more for my private purse than we shall amicably settle between ourselves.
“Fourthly. With regard to company, will make choice of those persons who shall be most agreeable to herself, and will be very attentive to those of her relations with whom she may wish to be connected—especially her mother and sister.
“Fifthly. Being aware of the foolish trouble occasioned by fastidiousness in the choice of food, am determined never to express my partiality for any particular joint or dish, and never to make the smallest objection to anything which comes to table. Remember Duke Fortunatus, and the incessant squabbles occasioned by his fluctuating taste and pettish tempers.
“So lastly. As to the arrangement of domestic concerns, will interfere as little as need be, and will never meddle either in the choice or dismissal of the servants, and will be careful never to find with them unnecessary fault.
“These rules and regulations I will read over the first day of every month, so long as it shall please God to spare me, and will make them matter of most serious prayer.
“Should I see fit to make any additions to the above, will still never destroy this identical paper, but keep it as exhibiting my views previous to marriage, and as a witness against me in future life, should I deliberately violate them.
“I write these rules in my college rooms on the 20th of May, 1811, being the day on which I complete the 27th year of my age, and being also the last of my remaining in Cambridge.
“George Mortimer.”
TO THE REV. J. ARMSTRONG.
Wellington, April 10th, 1812.
My very dear Friend,
I cannot describe the feeling of regret which the receipt of your last letter occasioned, and I sit down, with depressed spirits, to dictate an answer. There is something exceedingly gloomy in the recollection that one of the dearest friends I have on earth, is about to depart to a place where there is no human probability of our ever meeting; and that he should depart also without my being permitted to look him in the face, to clasp his hand, and to bid him a parting adieu. I feel truly grieved at the circumstance, and the more so, as I had expected that you would have been detained on shore longer than the time fixed on for your departure, and consequently that you would have had some little spare time to pay us a farewell visit.
* * * * * *
I feel comforted, however, with the hope of hearing from you occasionally, and do give you my promise that I will endeavour to write to you every other month, whether I hear from you or not; and my poor scrawls shall be duly forwarded to your good brother, as you have desired. I will inform you of our proceedings here as minutely as I can; and will take care to touch upon such of a more public nature as I conceive may possibly escape the attention of your other correspondents. But while I am thus writing, I cannot conceal from my Armstrong what has recently passed in my mind. I have long thought it to be a circumstance highly disgraceful to our Church that so few individuals have appeared who are willing to leave the comforts of life, and to endeavour to forward, by their own exertions, the grand and momentous work which the God of all grace is evidently carrying forward in all quarters of the globe; and I now begin to feel a desire (should the providence of God be pleased to open my path), to step forward in this great work. I have opened the matter to my Mary, and she tells me that she is willing to accompany me to any place where I should see it my duty to go. It has pleased God to give us a competency as to this world’s goods, and should any situation similar to the one you are going to, occur, we should really feel no hesitation in accepting it. What our future path may be is uncertain; but I should not wonder if my dear Armstrong hears of our following in the steps which he has marked out for us. There seems much to be done abroad, and few inclined to do it; should, therefore, God be pleased to accept of my poor intentions to be engaged in forwarding it, I shall rejoice in the circumstance, and gladly spend and be spent in so glorious an employment. I have said to my Armstrong what has been mentioned to no other individual whatever, my Mary excepted; I must therefore request he will not make the slightest allusion to it for the present.
I have taken the liberty to send you and Mrs. A. a small token of parting love; may they prove the means of your frequently remembering the unworthy donor, and whenever you think of him offer up a silent prayer for his spiritual advancement. I have also to request that you will accept of the enclosed notes; [30] they may, perhaps, prove serviceable in procuring a few more additional comforts for your voyage and future accommodations. May the God of love accompany you in your voyage, make you abundantly useful in your passage, and still more so in your destined situation. My prayers, my best wishes, do certainly attend you; and though we may not meet on earth, yet I hope—I would I could say more, but my treacherous heart will not permit me—but still I hope that you and I, our partners, and the children whom God may graciously give us, may all meet in that blissful state above. My Mary desires her kindest regards to Mrs. A. and yourself.
Believe me,
Your ever affectionate Friend,
G. M.
TO THE REV. J. ARMSTRONG.
Wellington, July 6th, 1812.
My dear Friend,
As it respects myself, I must say that I feel the comparatively trifling duties which I have to perform to