Anna and the Black Knight: Incorporating Anna’s Book. Fynn
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certainly,’ he replied. ‘Important to know where we are, and why too, if that’s a proper question. I’m really not certain of that.’
His calmness had left me totally puzzled. ‘John, I thought that you would …’
‘I would blow my top …’
I nodded.
‘You know, Fynn,’ he said with a smile, ‘I wasn’t born without faith. I had to work very hard for my lack of it. I wouldn’t want to stop you becoming a priest, if that is what you really want. All I must ask of you is that you think hard and long before you make up your mind.’
Perhaps I had made some movement, some indication that I was about to ask a question. He laid his hand on mine.
‘No questions, young Fynn, not now. Perhaps one day when you visit me, and I am sure that there will be many days, many, many visits, I might even tell you all, but not now. There is one thing, however, that bothers me most of all, which you might like to ponder over before you take the plunge. Will you please fetch my Bible from my study? It’s on the small table by the lamp. Don’t look so surprised, Fynn. I really do have a Bible, and what is more I have even read it. In fact, more than once, mainly in the hope that I might have missed something, but I fear I haven’t.’
I fetched the Bible and put it on the chair beside him and waited. His next words were such a surprise that I had to laugh.
‘Do you drink beer, Fynn?’
‘Well, I have once or twice, not much though.’
‘Perhaps a small glass won’t hurt a young man who is soon to go into the world. It’s my own brew and I’m really rather proud of it.’ He handed me a glass of beer.
‘Before you drink perhaps you will read me verses 19 and 20 of the second chapter of Genesis.’
‘And out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field and every fowl of the air, and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them and whatsoever Adam called every living thing that was the name thereof. And Adam …’
‘Enough, enough,’ John broke in. ‘Now you may drink.’
I took a swig.
‘Well, what do you think of that?’
‘Think of what?’
‘The beer first, of course, and if you have any comments, the verses next.’
‘The beer is good, John.’
‘Good, Fynn? Good? Why, the only word to describe that beer is sublime. Take another draught and then tell me what you think about those verses.’
‘I can’t see anything wrong with them, John. They look all right to me. If they are true, it’s wonderful. What are you on about?’
‘I’m not on about anything. If, as we are told, God is all powerful, omnipotent, et cetera, et cetera, then why, oh why am I required to be amazed, pleased or full of wonder at the things he is supposed to have made? I’m not. What does puzzle me, however, is why then did he do such a stupid thing as to ask Adam to name them? Damn it, Fynn. I mean Babel and all that nonsense. What with that and the supposed flood, he does seem to me to spend a lot of time undoing his own creations. If only Adam had had the good sense to give everything a number rather than a name, it would have saved us all a lot of heartache. Ah well, my young friend, after too many years of trying to teach mathematics, I have come to the conclusion that it’s the “numb” in numbers that causes the blockage. That is partly the reason why I am always so happy to have taught you and will always be so glad to see you. You are just a tiny bit different from my other pupils. Not much, mind you, but enough!’
I wanted to say something that would justify my difference, but nothing came.
‘For goodness sake, Fynn, don’t look so dumbfounded. Finish off your drink and indulge me occasionally in my hobby-horses. My problem is really quite simple. I cannot believe. It’s as simple as that. If I could, I would, but even now I have not said what I wanted to say. Anno Domini, I suppose. What I am trying to say to you is, whatever else mathematics might be, it is certainly a language and that’s important. Now, my young friend, it’s about time you were off. Let me know what you decide to do and please come again and often.’
I was really quite confused by all this. He had never been as open with me before and I felt that I would like to stay with him, except that it wouldn’t have been much use because I was perhaps even more uncertain about things myself. The idea that mathematics was a language was new to me and it gave me much to think about, for if it was true that you could talk about God in any language and if mathematics was a language, then … except that I couldn’t see how that might work.
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