Gathering Strength:. Peggy Kelsey
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In Afghanistan, all people are Islamic. But all during the fighting, the people who made a problem for me, who killed and injured my family, and who stole from me all claimed to be Islamic. If we really are Muslims, then we would never kill, steal, or do things against others. Afghanistan is an Islamic country, but there are no Muslims here!
Shakila: Islam encourages my commitment to my family. We each have a responsibility to the other. Because I have this commitment, because it’s part of my belief and part of my life, I can really enjoy life in Afghanistan. When I improve myself and have a commitment to other people in my life, I can help them improve, too.
Ramzia: All parts of Islam help me, but prayer helps the most. If I’m angry, sad, or nervous, praying and reading the Quran soothes and calms me a lot.
Anisa: First, the Quran itself helps me whenever I recite it. That’s what I do during my morning prayer and before I go to bed. It helps me calm down after a busy day.
When I was in the United States, wearing the scarf was a big deal and everybody would ask me about it. I got used to it and after a month, I knew all the questions they would ask. It made me find out the answers. When I returned, I went to the mullah I had known in Iran and asked him all the questions others had asked me. He thought it was very strange that I was asking questions and that America had changed me; he thought I was doubting my beliefs. I stopped asking him, but I kept reading books. There are many religious people like him who think it’s wrong to question.
I like the tradition of wearing the scarf, though, because it’s something the Quran asks us to do, and it makes us different from others. Our Prophet Mohammed wanted us to differentiate ourselves from the rest. I like that. I love everything about the Quran.
Zakiya N: I think it’s important to respect one’s parents. Children today don’t respect their parents as much and are more concerned about their own lives.
Suraya: Honesty. Whatever I do, I think, "God is watching me." You cannot hide anything from God.
I also believe that all humans are the same. Only God is higher than us. I do not like people who don’t respect a cleaning person or a servant. At work I respect the cleaner as much as I respect the director, because I respect someone on the basis of their behavior, not position. For example, I don’t like a person if they are fine to me but do wrong to someone else. Having good manners and good relations with people means a lot to me.
Peggy: How did you learn about Islam and how has your thinking about it changed?
Saleha: When I was very young, I attended religion classes but they never taught us the reasons behind what we were learning. In high school, I met some teachers who demonstrated those religious values. Now, I apply those principles in my life and have experienced that they are really true.
My religious beliefs haven’t really changed much. When I was younger I only thought about them; but now I’ve discovered them for myself. I’ve found that sometimes the obligations and limitations of Islam are good, but it depends on how they are carried out. For example, I think that the requirement that nine-year-old girls should fast during Ramadan is cruel. It’s important to be a nice person, so those duties should be carried out in a nice way.
Anisa: After our third year living in Iran, I went to a week-long summer program that taught us about the Quran and other things in our religion. We were all nine and ten years old, and there were a lot of activities for us. I enjoyed it.
Peggy: There are Quran schools and camps for girls as well?
Anisa: Yes. When I was in Iran, there were many.
Peggy: Was it a good experience for you?
Anisa: Yes, it really was, because it helped me understand a lot more. My younger sister didn’t get to go because we were already in Afghanistan by the time she was old enough. I kept all my materials and my books, so I taught her and we did the activities together. When our relatives wanted private time inside the house, I would go outside with her and teach her.
Peggy: When I heard other Afghan people talk about Iran, they said the Iranians taught by forcing students to memorize things without understanding them. They said that if students asked questions, they’d be beaten. Was that your experience?
Anisa: There are very poor schools that punish the students like that. In those places, they would hit the students on their hands with rulers, but that didn’t happen at our school. I really liked how they taught us. From the beginning, they trained our brains for memorization. We practiced study skills for six hours every day. We have a saying that if you lay the first brick in a house crooked, the walls will go up crooked and the house will not last.
Zakiya N: When children are young they usually follow their families’ thoughts on religion. After that, they need something to help them understand it deeply. In my own case, I don’t believe what my parents believe, because I have researched and arrived at different conclusions. I found my own way.
Rabia: I love Islamic society when people follow true Islam. I don’t rely on [secular] society’s idea of Islam because most of the things they say differ from what the Quran says. I studied Islam in school and have read the Farsi translation of the Quran. I found that a lot of the things that the mullahs say are not mentioned in the Quran. I’m not a strict person, but I like to study the Quran and I have my own views and opinions. My dad used to teach the Quran to me when I was little.
Setara: I was born into a Muslim family, making me a geographic Muslim first. During the Taliban, I had this idea that I had to know what the so-called "real Islam" was that I saw in the government. So I started studying Islamic books, and I saw Islam to be something else. Now, I’m proud as a Muslim, but also very sad. Why don’t I have the rights that Islam gives me?
Peggy: What else do you have to say about Islam?
Marzia: What I like about real Islam, not what we are practicing, is that it’s a religion that cannot go too extreme; it’s always moderate. I’m not a religious person, but