Real and Phantom Pains: An Anthology of New Russian Drama. John Freedman
Читать онлайн книгу.a beautiful baby and then stuff got in the way. My head got chock full of filth and I set off down the wrong road –
(The café. SNOWSTORM looks at ORANGINA. Tears run down ORANGINA’s cheeks.)
SNOWSTORM: You’re beautiful. Laid-back and deliberate. I love watching you bring a cigarette up to your mouth
ORANGINA: I simply cannot quit smoking
SNOWSTORM: There’s a dreaminess in your eyes
ORANGINA: Oh, I can’t listen to that anymore
SNOWSTORM: And indifference. To everything happening this very moment
ORANGINA (Puts out her cigarette): In order to quit smoking you just have to not smoke
SNOWSTORM: What are you reading?
ORANGINA: A new book
SNOWSTORM: I had one like that
ORANGINA: I don’t read fiction at all anymore
SNOWSTORM (Taking a call on his cell): Hello. I’m mainstream. Yes, I currently am in demand as never before. (Looks at his image on the television.) Your call has confirmed that once again
(Jail cell.)
BLIZZARD: It’s like my heart iced over and turned to stone. It’s numb, but that’s normal, they say. They say that’s natural. It happens to 94 percent of human beings. Now, of course, I realize I have never loved anyone, that all I ever had was a nagging desire for everyone to love and admire me. I wanted to find that one person who would love me. It’s like I was preparing myself as a gift for someone. I tanned myself in a salon. I love nothing but my own body, never even guessing that love was passing me by at that very moment. We shared nothing but temporary physical pleasures, which we all mistakenly call by one and the same name
(LENOCHKA, MANIAC and SNOWFLAKE enter the café and take off their coats. The girls kiss ORANGINA, take off their coats and other items, taking more and more and more clothing off.)
LENOCHKA: After that I immediately went and had a glass of wine. Then I went and indulged in the seven deadly sins
SNOWFLAKE: How was that?
LENOCHKA: In my thoughts, I mean
MANIAC: I went out and immediately lit up
ORANGINA: When you smoke, your prayers do not reach God
LENOCHKA: Why’s that?
ORANGINA: Because they cling to the earth like smoke
SNOWFLAKE: Angels come flying when you make the sign of the cross
MANIAC: And when you swear they fly away
SNOWFLAKE: A very bad hangover and deep depression
LENOCHKA: You’d think somebody could at least call, some guy of some sort
ORANGINA: You’re off limits. You’re married
SNOWFLAKE: Two men told me they love me today
MANIAC: And you want more, don’t you?
LENOCHKA (Nods towards ORANGINA): Can somebody get her out of her trance?
ORANGINA: I downed a vodka and it had no effect at all. Stone cold sober
LENOCHKA: How can you possibly drink vodka?
SNOWFLAKE: You can’t
MANIAC: Vodka? There ain’t nothin’ better
SNOWFLAKE: God, what I didn’t drink yesterday
(They all look over the menu.)
SNOWSTORM: Green tea?
LENOCHKA: Jasmine
ORANGINA: And Coca-Cola
SNOWFLAKE: I drank whiskey and martinis yesterday
LENOCHKA: They even have parmesan carpaccio with mushrooms
MANIAC: Parmesan is a no-no
SNOWSTORM: I don’t eat mushrooms
LENOCHKA: Why not?
SNOWSTORM: They make me want to vomit
MANIAC: They remind him of other mushrooms that he can’t eat anymore
LENOCHKA: People who have ingested a lot of mushrooms usually can’t even talk about it
SNOWFLAKE: Let alone eat them
MANIAC: I know
LENOCHKA: Is fish out, too?
ORANGINA: Out
SNOWSTORM: I don’t eat broccoli and I don’t eat carrots and I don’t eat sauerkraut
MANIAC: It’s easy for me, I’m a vegetarian. I don’t even touch meat
ORANGINA: I absolutely love carrots
SNOWFLAKE: You’ve lost weight
ORANGINA: Ten pounds in a week. I keep getting skinnier and skinnier
LENOCHKA: There’s something criminal about that
MANIAC: You just have a complex about it
SNOWSTORM: But a nun’s habit would become you
LENOCHKA: What about me?
MANIAC: You too
SNOWFLAKE: And me?
ORANGINA: It would become anyone
LENOCHKA: And a salad
SNOWFLAKE: How about shrimp?
MANIAC: That’s cheating then
LENOCHKA: Can’t have café glacé
SNOWFLAKE: Should I have a martini?
MANIAC: Against the rules
LENOCHKA: But you know, there’s something to that – abstaining for forty days
SNOWFLAKE: Fifty
MANIAC (Closing the menu): Okay, that’s it. Mineral water and black bread for everybody.
SNOWFLAKE: Only let’s not be fanatics about it.
(The street. SNOWSTORM leaves the café.)
SNOWSTORM:
Today I’m so frivolous,
Gracious and careless.
Melancholically dissatisfied with everything
I sail to meet my fate at midstream
(BUSHY-TAIL comes walking down the street, leading a dog on a leash. She carries a glossy magazine with her photo on the cover.
SNOWSTORM heads toward her; stops by his new car.)
Hey
BUSHY-TAIL: I didn’t recognize you right away in that cap
SNOWSTORM: That’s a pretty coat you’ve got. You remember that movie A Man and a Woman?
BUSHY-TAIL: No
SNOWSTORM: He’s a race car driver and she goes around in this coat
BUSHY-TAIL: How’re you doin’?
SNOWSTORM: I want to buy myself a T-shirt. I want to print a prayer on the back for everybody to read. I’ll write, “Lord, thank You, Lord, for all the beautiful things You have given me.”
BUSHY-TAIL: That’s cool
SNOWSTORM (Looking at the dog): That’s a pretty dog. Boy or girl?
BUSHY-TAIL: Boy
SNOWSTORM: Yeah... Women are more sexy than men, of course
BUSHY-TAIL: I don’t