Real and Phantom Pains: An Anthology of New Russian Drama. John Freedman
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his bloody hand, sliced in the fight. His lifeline has now been extended. He closes his eyes and slips into an indifferent sleep.
The Office. MANIAC, SNOWFLAKE, LENOCHKA and SNOWSTORM. BLIZZARD’s face has been replaced everywhere by SNOWSTORM’s.)
MANIAC: We all stand neck-deep in darkness. The only difference is that some of us look in the direction of the light. Others look to the dark
SNOWFLAKE (On the phone): Forty days without sex?!
LENOCHKA: That’s unfeasible
MANIAC: Like during the war. You huddle under a flag and defenders appear at your side. You know who you’re fighting for and against. With the whites or the reds. For good or for evil
SNOWSTORM: Most of the time I spend in the space between black and white. It’s rather gray, of course, but at least there’s movement. I know who’s sleeping with who. I know who does what where when and why and I appreciate every one of them equally
MANIAC: It’s nothing more than a mask
SNOWFLAKE: Fifty?!
LENOCHKA: Strange
SNOWFLAKE: I don’t think that’s my style
SNOWSTORM: I don’t use masks at all. I win people over with my extreme sincerity. I achieve results by means of the utmost candor. Basically, I never hide a thing. I don’t fear my emotions
MANIAC: I lead a double life.
LENOCHKA: Really?
MANIAC: I keep my manias and phobias in check. And I’ve got those babies up the ying-yang. Both manias and phobias
SNOWFLAKE: I didn’t know that; that you can’t. I realize that doesn’t justify me
SNOWSTORM: Hey you phobias of mine, you manias, you late anxieties and early fears
SNOWFLAKE: It’s just I’m a very emotional person
LENOCHKA: I confessed for three days
MANIAC: I did two
LENOCHKA: And he looked me so hard in the eyes, with that same kind of insolence I have when I’m showing off, and he had this two-faced smile
MANIAC: He can’t be two-faced
SNOWSTORM: You don’t even have the right to look him in the eye
MANIAC: You’re supposed to lower your gaze
SNOWSTORM: At least bow your head
SNOWFLAKE: This weather is oppressive
LENOCHKA: And he says, “At least bow your head.”
SNOWFLAKE: I’m sick and tired of this black-and-white film
MANIAC: All this Adam and Eve and the apple
LENOCHKA: I mean it wasn’t us that picked it
SNOWSTORM: Well, it’s time to pay up now
SNOWFLAKE: Could it be because I spent so much time on tranquilizers?!
MANIAC: That’s all really useful when you have to define all your shortcomings
LENOCHKA: You know what you’re supposed to do but you don’t do it
ORANGINA: After that it’s a matter of will power
MANIAC: You’ve got to make sense of your will power
SNOWSTORM: See if you have any or not
LENOCHKA: I don’t
SNOWFLAKE: Whenever it’s cold my mood and character go sour
SNOWSTORM: We are really lucky we live in a climate like this
MANIAC: It helps calm us, calm our flesh
LENOCHKA: Which is almost impossible to do in the more southerly countries
SNOWFLAKE (Hangs up the phone. Sighs): Maybe we ought to fly somewhere, huh? Like Bali
MANIAC: It’s a good idea, though
(The jail cell.)
BLIZZARD: I’ve changed lately. I haven’t exactly figured out how yet. All my thoughts on it are still at loose ends. Basically everybody just goes along paying no attention to where they’re going. What the hell is the meaning of life? Career? Fame? Money? I mean, in my mind I know that’s not what’s important. But what is important – I don’t know. But I think about it. Why? Because that’s what everybody talks about. And I know there is love.
(BLIZZARD thinks about ORANGINA. ORANGINA walks down the street, as beautiful as a character from a Bergman movie. Men look her in the eye and watch her pass; she lowers her eyelashes.)
ORANGINA: When will I achieve perfection? When will this sin leave me? When will I quit having all these voluptuous dreams? When will I quit dreaming? When will I become more pure spiritually? When? Lord, purify me of all this filth. Lord, absolve me of my youthful sins.
(The bar at a café. The television is on, showing the BCH news with the sound turned off. The star presenter SNOWFLAKE (no longer smiling) reports on a war. VOLODYA looks her over carefully, drinks beer, chews pistachios.)
VOLODYA: The only thing I can’t figure out is why people wage war. Man, they’re always at war... For what? Why? Money? Principles? I don’t get it. I mean, with Hitler it made sense. But what’s this going on now? Man, live and let live. I just really don’t know. I don’t get this politics. I mean, have these people never felt pain or something?
(“BCH” station identification and an ad for “Eternity is Ahead! Infinity is no Limit!” BUSHY-TAIL appears on screen, says something and smiles. She is framed by the words “Icon of the Season.” VOLODYA turns on the sound.)
BUSHY-TAIL: In the Far North we have icicles like you’ve never seen here. Our icicles flow off the roof over the windows and it’s like the houses are encased in ice. Icicles like that are really dangerous. If an icicle like that falls on your head, it’s all over.
(“BCH” station identification and an ad for “No Fear in Love.”)
VOLODYA: What a stupid death
(SNOWSTORM and ORANGINA drink coffee at the next table. ORANGINA wears a black dress and has a pure expression on her face. She wears no make-up and her hair is pulled back simply. She holds a big Book.)
SNOWSTORM: Look, I have everything. I’ve achieved everything I wanted to achieve. What is there for me to ask of God? I don’t know. I have everything I’ve ever wanted. You see my eyes?
ORANGINA: You have blue, blue eyes
SNOWSTORM: Look into my retinas. What do you see there? Do you even see a hint of sorrow?
ORANGINA: No, there’s no sorrow in them
SNOWSTORM: What about fear?
ORANGINA: No, there’s no fear in them
SNOWSTORM: Love?
ORANGINA: No
SNOWSTORM: Come on, look closer. What do you see there?
ORANGINA: There’s nothing there at all
SNOWSTORM: I even bought the exact car I wanted to have
ORANGINA: What kind?
SNOWSTORM: A Peugeot. Convertible.
(Jail cell. A sunbeam comes through the window and hits BLIZZARD right on the crown of the head.)
BLIZZARD: But love turned out to be something else altogether. Not connected to what I wanted to have. I had hope, I lived in constant expectation of something. But it turns out love is bound up only with whatever you hope to give. You can count on requited love only if fortune smiles on you. But I understand now that’s not essential. It’s as if my tears