Letters from a Better Me. Rachael Wolff
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You Kidding Me?
Our unguarded truthful reaction about the craziness we see in humanity
When we have that sort of thought, it’s the call to awareness about what is really going on in our heads. All the anger, frustration, fear, and rage go on alert and make us question our beliefs about humanity itself. We go on judgmental rampages and spew harsh views to anyone who will listen, thinking we are standing up for our gender and making a statement. Fist raised, we fight against. “Are you kidding me?” translates to: Watch out, world, you are about to feel my wrath. Who knows what will arise from the depths?
Life has an interesting way of showing us how much progress we’ve made. When we have these kinds of “I’m giving you a piece of my mind!” reactions that make us question our own humanity, we still have a lot of work to do in our innermost depths. Why? It’s an unconscious reaction. We show our rage and anger, but we won’t show our peace and humanity. We are not going to make the best world-changing decisions in this space. Fighting against the problem won’t solve the problem. When we react like this, we are ready for war. We are not at peace, because we aren’t peaceful within ourselves. We haven’t had a chance to question our own thoughts and beliefs, let alone consider the perspective of anyone we disagree with.
As women, we in some way have contributed to our lack of value in the world. We need to see the truth about where this anger is coming from.
•How are our feelings, thoughts, perspectives of truth, and actions affecting our reality?
•How are others affecting our inner and outer world?
Women are experiencing a lot of collective pain right now. Some may consider this a bad thing, but I see it as an awakening. It’s women’s time to rise. The flame has been lit. We are struggling to find our footing in this awakening of women’s spirits. There needs to be a point where we transition from the victim role to #IKnowMyWorth. The time is now!
For women who have felt slighted by opportunities and pay…
Dear Outraged Women,
How the hell did we get here? I’m infuriated at how judgmental companies can be just knowing the applicant is a woman. It’s looking more and more like we need to do blind resumes, interviews, and testing to get out of our judgmental ways in the workplace. Why is pay different for a man versus a woman? Minority women are getting paid less than white women for the same jobs with the same qualifications. Resumes can be flagged based on the name at the top as “read” or “don’t read.” This is absurd! Our racism and sexism show so much in the workplace.
Why is this happening? We need more feminine energy out there, no matter what nationality we are! How can a company see from all angles if it doesn’t represent all angles in its hiring process? A company that can capture female and male strengths will have more to offer, but instead they just suppress the woman’s voice by showing her she’s not as appreciated, her education and experience doesn’t matter, and that her strengths aren’t as important as a man’s. Do these companies think we can’t be as productive as a man because we can/do bear children?
Some arguments are made that women aren’t applying for the best jobs. Then the question is, why aren’t they applying? Are they advertising in publications women read? Is their marketing aimed more toward men? What are they doing to support equal rights for women? When women do apply, there must be a way to ensure equal consideration and pay. We are not that stupid! Business owners need to rise up and come up with pay for a job, man or woman, minority or Caucasian, regardless. The pay is the pay!! It’s not right that a woman has to prove herself so much more to close the gap in pay. My friend was just told she couldn’t get a raise because she capped out, but a man doing the same job with fewer qualifications is making more than she is. How the hell could she be capped out if she is making less than a male at the same management level? THIS DRIVES ME CRAZY!! She won the company awards and he lost them some big customers, yeah, he fucking deserves to be paid more… WHAT THE HELL!
This is an outrage! I can’t believe we are really still here! If I’m just as qualified to have the job, then I should have an equal opportunity to get it and to prosper in the same way as my male counterpart. The gaps are so ridiculous. How are companies and men still getting away with this?
An Outraged Me
For women who feel household expectations are way off…
Dear Household Partner,
I don’t know who assigned the household rules, but I have some serious bones to pick. If two parents are working full-time, why, in many cases, are women still the ones expected to handle childcare, cooking, and cleaning? How the hell are we still here? Here, honey, you go have a drink and decompress in the living room while I do the homework with the kids, make dinner, and figure out how to get to baseball by six and dance by six thirty. But hey, you enjoy your relaxation time; you need it!
Oh wait, let me do the dishes after I make dinner. You go play with the kids or watch TV. Then give them to me when it’s time for their baths and getting ready for bed. Wait, I still have the house to clean after your play session. Oh, you want another beer? Are we living in the era of the 1950s perfect-family stay-at-home-mom TV shows? Well, I’m not staying at home. I’m working too. There needs to be equal responsibilities in the household. If you are sitting around, it should be because we are both done doing everything we need to do and we get to relax together, or both enjoy our own time as individuals.
Oh, now that I’ve been going nonstop since five thirty this morning, you want to have sex. If you wanted sex, you should have cooked dinner while I helped with homework. Got the kids bathed and ready for bed while I did the dishes, since you made dinner. I don’t have a partner, so I can be stuck doing everything. I chose having a partner because I thought we were in this together. I didn’t want someone who was just going to sit and watch me do all the work and then say, “You didn’t tell me you needed help.” REALLY???
If you had that attitude at work, you would be fired. Give me a break! I’m so sick of being exhausted all the time. Sometimes I look at my friends who are single moms, and I wonder how much harder that really is, if I’m doing everything already. I didn’t sign up for this. How can you not see that it’s wrong for you to be relaxing if I’m still working to get the kids and you taken care of? How can you not see the picture enough to take the reins and do something to help? Make a fucking chart if you need to, but don’t be sitting around doing your own personal stuff while I’m busting my ass. I want to relax and do personal stuff too.
A Fed-Up Me
How the Hell Did We Get Here?
A question many of us have asked ourselves as we fall into our assigned submissive roles as women
It has been a long time since we gained the right to vote, but are we any closer to being viewed with equal value? Has there been progress? Yes, there has been. Have there been setbacks? Well, duh!
Sometimes we are blinded by roles that have been passed down from generation to generation as acceptable. We have done so much to advance, but we are still limiting ourselves when we can’t see the worth of every individual. How are we going to get past color, race, sexual orientation, and religious belief if we can’t even get to the balance between his and her, yin and yang? Are we ready to open our eyes enough to see that we aren’t helping anyone by keeping someone else down? We don’t have to be against anyone. We can simply be for humanity. We are not in a competition to be better than anyone else. Our purpose is to be the best version of ourselves. So, I repeat, how the hell did we get here?
•Where are these beliefs about being less-than coming from?
•Where are we accepting unacceptable behavior?
•Are we communicating our feelings, or putting our energy into more of what we don’t want?
For women questioning faith…
Dear Spirit,
I don’t even know who is listening when I write this. Is it God? Is it a great void in the Universe? If there is a Being up there or in me somewhere, tell